“You’ll always lose money chasing women but you will never lose women chasing money”

-Black Aristotle

Yesterday, Sports Illustrated ran an article on athlete and celebrity relationships. Their picture gallery can be found here.

After seeing the couples, it got me thinking about all the beautiful women who whore themselves out to be a ‘Sports Wife.’

So I did my research…

Jason Kidd loves to ‘beat’ that chest.

“I just saved a bunch of money on dialysis by switching to Geico”

Kobe Bryant’s wife deserves her own writeup. They met, while she was 17, while she was working as a background dancer for Tha Eastsidaz. No offense, but I don’t know how I feel about my future wife being introduced to me by Snoop Dogg. If that isn’t bad enough, she s the only person in the world to own an automatic-only Lamborghini Murciélago. This is just retarded. First of all, most people would not know how to drive this car. Second of all, and most important, you don’t convert THIS DAMN CAR to a auto transmission. LEARN HOW TO DRIVE A STICK. Ok…I need to move on before I lose it…

Emmitt Smith says “Who needs the Cardinals when I can’t lose?”

Pete Sampras epitomizes the American Dream. Get rich. Be ugly. Get attractive woman.

Anna Benson. She calls herself a golddigger and told a radio show that she would screw everyone on the team if she found out her husband cheated on her. If I was on that team, I would make sure to find some groupies for her husband in a hurry.

This is perhaps the worst. She is married to NASCAR driver, Jeff Gordon. Do I really need to say any thing else on this subject?

Honorable Divorce Mentions: Vanessa Williams, Halle Berry.

Those two don’t really count because they found more fame than Rick Fox and David Justice; however, I enjoyed the Google Images experience.