Archive for the 'Reggie Bush' Category

So yea, we’re really back this time

Published by flohtingPoint on August 28, 2008 in NC State, Robert Downey Jr, Batman, South Carolina, Stanford, Brett Favre, Oregon State and Reggie Bush. 4 Comments

“Here I am, on the road again…” - Bob Seger, Turn the Page

Last time, on 24, our hero got shit canned from his job and his financial status was in peril…


The following takes place between 09:44 and 10:44 on the morning of the college football season opener.

To play catchup, my company’s contract in St. Louis (actually Scott AFB) got bought out and I was jobless.  One week later, my bitch of a girlfriend breaks up with me.  So, without getting too emo and asking Stained to come out on stage and sing me one of their shitty songs, let’s just say I blew town.

Now residing in the DC area (Virginia side yo), I have the perfect job for sports blogging one could ask.  I have no office, my job is 100% travel and my hours are whenever I feel like working.  Yea, for the last few months I probably could have done daily entries, but fuck, I had no inspiration.  My best goes out to all my fellow writers out there, as I honestly had jack shit to talk about when both football and basketball’s (he said “balls”) season are done and there is nothing on TV aside from fuckass baseball (well there’s F1 and Tennis but nobody actually gives a shit about them aside from me).

Anyway, enough is enough and we’re I’m back (as Amaysing has been AWOL for, fuck ever, haven’t even talked to him in like three weeks, dude must be wicked busy or something).

Yesterday I was checking out Yahoo.com for the upcoming college football games (cause ESPN.com is way too sluggish and Yahoo.com has some type of hatred for Reggie Bush that I find hilarious anyway), when I came across an article about Robert Downey Jr. finding Batman too complicated.  And I quote:

“I get it.  This is so high brow and [expletive] smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie”

Robert, it’s Bat fucking Man.  Retards and 10 year olds can follow this but you’re carrying on like you’re watching 12 Monkeys or some shit.  Jesus, I know you did a lot of blow but so did Belushi and he had no problems with Animal House and The Blues Brothers (both of which are on the same level, intellectually, as Batman).

-Rubix cubes?  Complicated.

-Bush getting re-elected?  Baffling.

-Those cryptic patterns of symbols the Zodiac Killer kept sending to the police?  Mind boggling.

-Batman? You’re a dumbshit.

The only thing I found confusing about The Dark Knight was why everyone deems it necessary to give Heath Ledger sloppy blowjobs just because he’s dead.  Honestly, fuck him.  Just like Sean Taylor, there will be no posthumus handjobs here.  RIP?  Sure.  Oscar worthy? Fuck off.

For those of you who have not seen this dumbass comic book movie but are hellbent on wasting 3 hours of your life on it, first watch a bunch of Lewis Black.  Heath constantly rips off Lewis’ body language the whole film, to the point of outright plagiarism.

Enough with Robert the Retard and Heath the Corpse, college football kicks off today.  Finally we will have something else to see on SportsCenter aside from MLB and Brett Favre sightings.  Games to watch?  Aside from Random ShitSchool vs Other Random ShitSchool, we have Stanford vs Oregon State and NC State vs the South Carolina Cawks.  I dont know about you folks but I’m definitely ditching work early to get obliterated before these games.

Tomorrow: More curse words with sports topics tossed in intermittently and also the BIWMB (been a long time coming).

A long time coming

Published by flohtingPoint on January 11, 2008 in Fuck USC, Reggie Bush and NCAA. 2 Comments

“Dinner was being prepared three time zones away on the West Coast on December 10, 2005. Lloyd Lake was sitting in his television room with buddies at his home in Southern California, watching the Heisman Trophy presentation to his friend Reggie Bush. But it wasn’t a sight that Lake enjoyed as he shifted uncomfortably on the couch and muttered to himself. Actually, he couldn’t believe what he had seen and heard. About everything that Bush owned at that point, Lloyd Lake had helped pay for. And yet, as Bush was accepting college football’s most prestigious award and getting ready to play in the most important game of his career – the national championship against Texas in 25 days – Lake realized that Bush had turned on him.” - Don Yaeger and Jim Henry, Tarnished Heisman

http://sports.yahoo.com/ncaaf/news?slug=ys-…

It was probably a year ago that I first found the reports and allegations on Yahoo.com that Reggie Bush had taken gifts/money. Upon first glimpse, it was a great read, but it was also around this time that the nation was still irrationally captivated with this mediocre/sub-average running back, so I figured nothing was going to come of it. Well, at least until Reggie Bush shit the bed once again this year.

When Reggie first came into the league, 99,999/100,000 people were on his nuts, saying he was going to be the best running back ever, the next Gayle Sayers, Bowie over Jordan (in reference to his draft position), etc. For a span of around six to seven months there, I thought I was the only person with any God damned common sense. People were losing their minds over a fucking nobody who was putting up pathetic game after pathetic game. Sometimes I wondered if everyone was actually watching the same shit I was…

On December 3rd, 2006, 13 weeks into Reggie’s first season, he finally had a big game (albeit against the 49ers…), and society simultaneously had to change their pants from the massive ejaculation they experienced (like he didn’t play horribly mediocre for 12 weeks before that). When Reggie had that big play against the Bears in the playoffs, nobody (including the dumbfuck refs on the field) called the illegal screen set up by Marcus Colston, making the whole play void… At the beginning of the next season, ESPN had Reggie listed as one of the top 5 backs in the NFL, I wanted to tear my fucking hair out cause this worthless fuck wasn’t even the best running back on his team. His game was so shitty that it was giving me pink eye, but everyone else just kept buying the hype…

Week 3 of this season, the one thing that could expose a lot the excuses put forth by Reggie Bush sympathizers happened. Deuce went down with a season ending injury, making Reggie the premiere back. It was time to put up or shut the fuck up, and Reg chose the latter, having a joyfully shitcrusted year, capped off by an injury. Gradually folks started to wake up and see the light. People all across the nation started saying to themselves, “Hey, this motherfucker right here isn’t even the 10th best back in the NFC…” As Reggie’s truth became more and more apparent to the dumbfuck masses, the more talk there was about him being on the take in college, and talks of possibly stripping him of his Heisman and invalidating USC’s wins during that span. It was no surprise that it was also around this time that Reggie shitcanned his agent.

You had better believe that in four days, I will be in front of a Barnes and Nobles with a huge ass shit-eating grin on when this book comes out. Depending on how thick it is, it may wind up getting crushed that same day. Any bad news for Reggie, is always great news for me. And with this, I’m out, enjoy your weekend fuckers.

How the fuck…?

Published by flohtingPoint on November 19, 2007 in oprah, Moosecocked idiots, The Media and Reggie Bush. 2 Comments

“It’s true, you are a good woman. Then again, you may be the Antichrist.” - Doc Holiday, Tombstone

There are times when I’ll be sitting at work, not particularly working, just day dreaming of some sort, when an epiphany will hit me like a ton of bricks.  Last week was my latest one…  There I was, minding my business and staring at the ceiling with a blank stare when it dawned on me. HOW THE FUCK DOES OPRAH HAVE SO MUCH FUCKING MONEY?

Successful people utilize exceptional marketing techniques.  Some people capitalize off the business savvy (ie: IBM in the 80’s), some people capitalize off slave labor and sweatshops (ie: Nike) and some even capitalize off the stupid (ie: George and Reggie Bush).  Oprah doesn’t follow any of these paths.  In fact, when you break it down, the path she follows sounds like a sure fire way to LOSE money, not make it.  Oprah capitalizes off the unemployed. Her fucking TV show comes on when anyone who actually makes fucking money is at work!

“But floh, she has a successful magazine,” you might vomit onto my shoes.  Right, you ever read that piece of shit?  It might as well say OPRAH on the fucking cover, then have 200 pages of advertisements in it.  I mean shit, at least Good Housekeeping and Cosmo teach you how to properly fuck your man… You’re not winning any Pulitzer Prizes writing for this stack of flapjacks n’ feces.


Shopping and John John’s plane crash…
Truly innovative journalism there.

According to Forbes, Steve Jobs is worth 5.7 billion and he made it through being extremely innovative in the Microsoft dominated world of IT.    Bill Gates is worth ten times that much from stealing from Steve Jobs.  Oprah, while only worth about half of Steve Jobs’ net, made billions (yea, plural), from… marketing to unemployed morons.  And people wonder why I fucking hate money.

Near afternoon edit:
—————————

Ever been addicted soda and wrote a blog about trying to quit?  If so, you’re equally as dumb as Reggie Bush fans our unbelievably stupid blog of the day: http://shauntaysblog.blogspot.com/ 

Hi dis is Shauntay and I am gonna try not to drimk soda for 30 days. I love soda. I drink soda more than 5 times a day, and people say that drinkin soda is really bad for me. But I dont listen to them. So when I found out that Mr.C was doin a 30 Day project with us I thought that this would be a great oppurtunity for me to try not to drink soda for 30 days. If I like not drinkin sodas for 30 days then I might just do it for the rest of my life.(LOL)

I liked Adrian Peterson the first time I saw him….

Published by flohtingPoint on November 12, 2007 in Fuck USC, Adrian Peterson, NFL and Reggie Bush. 0 Comments

http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news;_ylt=AncEXxKckUBBBlxiT0TUk345nYcB?slug=ap-vikingspeterson&prov=ap&type=lgns

“This guy’s going to be like Billy…” - Barry Switzer, former Oklahoma coach

Ol Barry Shitface had no fucking clue how right he was about to be as he said this quote before this years draft.  Me?  Yea, I knew.  Check it out in my previous post about this summer.  I actually called this shit long before the draft even happened, before Adrian left college.  Since only 4 people read this blog, I can’t exactly say “99% of you have no clue what I’m saying”, so we’ll go with 75% of you instead.

Adrian, meet you before you were even you.  Before your little DNA army ejected itself from your pops dick and took up residence in your mothers uterus.  Meet Billy Sims.

Billy!!!!
Billy Sims

Billy was an Oklahoma running back alot like you Adrian.  You both received Heisman attention (Billy actually won it, where as you fell short to some fucking loser who plays quarterback for the Arizona Cardinals).  Billy had one good year in college amongst years cut short by injury (sound familiar).  Billy received national attention after being drafted by the Detroit Lions, winning the Rookie of the Year award and was voted to the Pro-Bowl (you play in the same division and will be granted both honors this year).

Everything I have mentioned sounds fucking awesome right?  Yea, try mentioning that to a Lions fan…  Billy Sims, while an amazing back, was ultimately fragile (hitting a bit too close to home now, huh Adrian, hurry to the potty before you shit your pants).  The Lions began devising an offense around their young superstar, without giving the fact that Billy’s bones were made of rice-cakes and his ligaments were constructed from Bubbletape.  The fact that they didnt respect how frail he was proved to be their downfall.  Billy destroyed his knee in 84, just over three years after being drafted, leaving the Lions fucked and ending his career. 

Yes, I liked Adrian Peterson the first time I saw him, when he was called Billy Sims.

Now, for you numbnuts who were going berserk for Adrian before this recent injury, saying that he should have been taken first (or higher) in the draft…   Who the fuck wants a running back who cant even be counted on to take his 20+ carries a game?  Who is a big enough of a moron to fathom debating that Adrian will amount to anything other than another flash in the pan?  Answer: You. You are fucking retarded, dumb, the opposite of smart.  This is why you work at fucking Cosco, stocking douche-bags.  You boss is smart enough to have you inventory the very device that best sums up your existence.

The truth about Adrian Peterson is that he is a very exciting player to watch.  When healthy, he is more than worthy of the magnitude of hype that Reggie Bush has (and will never live up to).  When healthy, is the key though.  Adrian is due for the type career that shitdicks with Osteoporosis have.  He is one awkward hit away from becoming a crippled fuck and trading cast signatures with Alvin Mack from The Program. Its not a matter of if, its a matter of when.

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