Author Archive for Amaysing1

Saturday Night Basketball

If you are a fan of basketball on any level, you had many opportunities to enjoy great competition this Saturday evening.

UNC/Duke:

College Basketball was headlined by the Duke/UNC rivalry. UNC was up by 11 at the half but Duke came back strong and closed the gap. This was until they forgot how to play in the last 5 minutes. Credit has to go to the UNC defense; yet, it is unacceptable when a team cannot find a way to score especially in such a key game. Well anyways, UNC took the win and the ACC title. A lot of people are predicting that UNC can win the entire tournament. I am predicting Southern Illinois University to win it because…well, I took the majority of my college coursework there…and I am an idiot.

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Kentucky players must be too busy with women like this
to compete with Duke and UNC.

 

UCLA/CAL:

This game is defined by the circus shot made by Josh Shipp in the closing seconds.

It was incredible…

It was fascinating…

It was illegal…

NCAA Rule 7, Section 1, Article 3 states ”The ball shall be out of bounds when it passes over the backboard from any direction.”

Well you be the judge.

 

In other college news

  • Winthrop won Big South Championship; Can someone please explain to me how Kenny George isn’t severely overrated?
  • Georgetown won the Big East. Allen Iverson is still skipping practice and ‘Zo still is enjoying his money from the Raptors.
  • USC got its first win over Stanford this year; Players seen after the game making fun of Pete Carroll and his football team.


Rockets win 18th straight game

What a disappointing game. I might be the only person feeling that way because the Rockets beat my team, the Hornets.

Nonetheless, Yao said after the game “I’m not going to let this stop me from working on playing for my country in the Olympics.”

Did anyone see this streak coming? This is totally unexpected especially for a team that can’t stay healthy. Well the credit has to be given to the team. They are only one of six in the history of the NBA to have that long of a streak.

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Get ready for Rafer Alston commercials again

 


Jason Kidd plays against old team; Wife is ok and not beaten

This game proved a lot.

1. The Nets still don’t care about this season.

2. The best trade this year was the Pau Gasol trade to the Lakers.

Nonetheless, the Mavericks won the game. Surprise! (sarcasm).

In other NBA news:

  • Miami replayed their game against Atlanta and nobody cared.
  • Lebron scored 38 points against the Pacers to win the game.

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This has nothing to do with anything…but I like it

News Alertz: Brett Favre Un-retires!

“One more year, Brett! Please, one more year”

-United Nations canned reply to this great tragedy

Horsetoothed prides itself on providing accurate and newsworthy information to its millions of readers. A recent study by Alexa.com shows that Horsetoothed received 250000 unique visitors every hour.

My point?

Horsetoothed is the first blog/news-site to report that Brett Favre has un-retired and will be playing one more year for the Packers this fall.

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“Come on guys. You thought this was over? It isn’t even draft-time.”

We have secured the rights to his first interview since the un-retirement. The transcript is below:

Horsetoothed (HT): Mr. Favre, what made you decide to come back to the game of Football.

Brett Favre: Honestly, I couldn’t stay away from the game.

HT: Could you give more specifics, please?

Favre: Ok, ok, you got me. My dick hurts. I didn’t know that it would get sucked on so much by the media. I mean, I knew that I had groupies but this is out of control.

HT: Well you are loved by many in the media and in the football world.

Favre: Oh, I get that. But this is ridiculous. I mean Peter King called me and asked for a hair sample from me to get through the mourning. Is this guy for real?

HT: Why do you think you retired in the first place?

Favre: Because I am a gunslinger

HT:…that doesn’t make sense

Favre: My last moment is losing to Eli Manning! Fuck u. This interview is over.

*Favre gets up from interview

HT: Mr. Favre! Wait. Come back. We have beer…

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 ”Favre’s going away party didn’t go as planned for Eli Manning”

Steroids Are Good For You

Mondays….bleh….who needs them?

After an action packed weekend of Shawn Marion’s debut as a Miami Heat, the greatest Pro Bowl of all-time and UNC only beating Clemson for the 3535462 time, you would think that the last thing you would see on the news or ESPN would be continuing coverage of Steroids.

*sarcasm

The coverage on steroids has gotten ridiculously out of hand. Congress’ involvement is asinine. Baseball must really want to seal its fate with dragging on this dead story. You know what baseball needs right now to get out of the Steroid Era? They need more action. Try recording 17 sacks in only 12 games and people would be forgetting steroids in no time.

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“Who cares about Poverty in America, $100 dollar oil and a mortgage problem when Congress can be worried about this guy”

What….you don’t agree? You think the purity of baseball has been lost? You must be an idiot.

Baseball has never been a pure sport. Baseball is a melting pot of great Black, White, Asian and Latino players; yet, only Whites could play the game prior to 1947. How in the hell were all the records ‘pure’ prior to this year when they didn’t allow everyone a chance to play the game?

Don’t even let me get started on pitchers who ‘worked’ baseballs, changes of the mound height and groundsmen training the baseball field to the home team’s advantage.

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Alyssa Milano would have had no Black/Asian/Latino players to have sex with before 1947

In addition, the witch hunt for Barry Bonds is despicable. Roger Clemens is receiving a great deal of coverage; however, he is not being demonized as Barry was during his time in the limelight. How is this fair to Barry Bonds? What about his due process? Rafael Palmeiro failed a drug test after his testimony and his story has faded in the background.

In contrast, Marion Jones is sitting in prison, shamed and stripped of all records of her achievements. It wouldn’t surprise me if UNC would remove her name off their championship run.

The Problem?

Barry Bonds fits the mold of the big, bad athlete that a large following of people love to hate. (See: Michael Vick, Mike Tyson, etc). In no way am I saying that they deserve a pass. I am all for ensuring that celebrities don’t get the special treatments to break the law; yet, common sense isn’t that common, it appears. People love to judge, but hate to be judged.

 

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“Chuck D says ‘Fuck The Media’”

So what’s my point? Steroids are good for you. Used in moderation, they can make you recover from injury and muscle deterioration faster. HGH is used to treat AIDS patients and can be given to young children and adults with a weak pituitary gland. When abused, Steroids can give you an unfair advantage in sports, bodybuilding contests and can kill you.

If you want mini-nuts and a stressed heart, do what makes you happy. Just don’t keep trying to tell me that steroids are killing a sports that no one cared about until two steroid users started breaking home-run records.

Retirement of flohtingPoint

Fans,

(yes, all two of you)

It is with great remorse that I announce the retirement of flohtingPoint.

Earlier today, I received the awkward text/picture message below from flohtingPoint.

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“It used to be 7 Seconds or Less…”

 

Initially, when I received the message, I just took it that he wasn’t appreciative of the trade that his team made for Shaq. I replied back with ‘Man the fuck up. He should help with getting past Duncan.” Nonetheless, flohtingPoint called me later to announce his retirement from the blog. He said that he wanted to go out on top and didn’t want to ‘come back like Jordan wearing the four-five”

…This just in

(Sportscenter ALERT and possible loss of brain cells)

Pat Riley just said perhaps some of the dumbest shit I have heard in a while. He said ‘Seeing Shawn and Dwayne together reminds me of when Jordan and Pippen first got together.” Ok, Pat Riley needs to go cut his hair and give his team up to a different coach to build up until he is ready to take over again.

On a quick side note, I want to once again point out my hate for Tom Brady’s incredible life. Recently a beautiful woman proposed to Tom Brady during the news conferences before the Superbowl. I remember her being very attractive.

I will put a video below and let you be the judge.

(Disclaimer: It is in Espanol but who cares)

Tom Brady turns down puss like this…

Oh yeah, I missed a hell of a game between the Suns-Hornets tonight because it didn’t show out here. A double-overtime victory for the Hornets at that. On that note, it’s time for sleep. I expect flohtingPoint to talk shit in the morning and I look forward to it.