Archive for August, 2008

Finally Fucking Friday

Published by flohtingPoint on August 29, 2008 in US Open, McCain, South Carolina, Stanford, College Football, fff and BIWMB. 0 Comments

“Oh, sell me the infection, it is only for the weak…” - In Flames, Only for the Weak

Anyone else watch the Democratic National Convention?

Bueller?  Bueller?  Bueller?

Yea,  me neither.  I’m flipping between the Stanford game, the Cawks game and the US Open.  Good job fuckheads, pick the one day when meaningful football returns and try to run head to head with it.  After months of the United States having to put up with the futile sport that is baseball, you have your political party circle-jerk on the kickoff of college football.  A huge, sincere thumbs up.  My ass may just vote for McCain now.

In a complete display of how pathetic most folks are, apparently there are some iPhones in circulation that have pictures of some fat-headed homely looking bitch on them that is causing quite a commotion.  iDouchebags across the globe are going nuts over this shit. Acclamations of “OMG CUTE” are being iShouted on blogs, boards and webpages by losers whose only photos of girls on their phones before this were from the one’s they’ve been stalking.  Honestly, if I got a phone with shit like this on it, I’d just be happy if I could delete them (I have like 17 photos on my shitty phone that came default that are undeletable).

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Hopefully she’ll be iShitcanned soon before the infection spreads.

 In non-fugly related news, it’s been a long time coming, on to this weeks BIWMB (Blogger I Wouldn’t Mind Banging).

 This week I’m sorta cheating, as this blog is more of an advertisement ploy than an actual blog.  There is very little, if any, pertinent information in this blog, but then again most of my previous ones were all from Sweden, scribed in unintelligible gibberish, so it’s not like we’re missing out on anything.

This weeks BIWMB is Taylor Stevens (NSFW).  According to one of my favorite sites, Boobpedia (which is like Wikipedia, cept for porn stars, NSFW!!!!), Taylor was born in Toronto, Canada and is of Middle Eastern decent.  Her blog is used to plug her webcam which she uses to make a living by sitting at home and jiggling her breasts (which if you ask me, is a totally respectable way of life).

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Taylor used to be fucking enormous, but as I’ve
always said, God bless bitches that use science to create
things I want to put my dick in.

So yea, we’re really back this time

Published by flohtingPoint on August 28, 2008 in NC State, Robert Downey Jr, Batman, South Carolina, Stanford, Brett Favre, Oregon State and Reggie Bush. 4 Comments

“Here I am, on the road again…” - Bob Seger, Turn the Page

Last time, on 24, our hero got shit canned from his job and his financial status was in peril…


The following takes place between 09:44 and 10:44 on the morning of the college football season opener.

To play catchup, my company’s contract in St. Louis (actually Scott AFB) got bought out and I was jobless.  One week later, my bitch of a girlfriend breaks up with me.  So, without getting too emo and asking Stained to come out on stage and sing me one of their shitty songs, let’s just say I blew town.

Now residing in the DC area (Virginia side yo), I have the perfect job for sports blogging one could ask.  I have no office, my job is 100% travel and my hours are whenever I feel like working.  Yea, for the last few months I probably could have done daily entries, but fuck, I had no inspiration.  My best goes out to all my fellow writers out there, as I honestly had jack shit to talk about when both football and basketball’s (he said “balls”) season are done and there is nothing on TV aside from fuckass baseball (well there’s F1 and Tennis but nobody actually gives a shit about them aside from me).

Anyway, enough is enough and we’re I’m back (as Amaysing has been AWOL for, fuck ever, haven’t even talked to him in like three weeks, dude must be wicked busy or something).

Yesterday I was checking out Yahoo.com for the upcoming college football games (cause ESPN.com is way too sluggish and Yahoo.com has some type of hatred for Reggie Bush that I find hilarious anyway), when I came across an article about Robert Downey Jr. finding Batman too complicated.  And I quote:

“I get it.  This is so high brow and [expletive] smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie”

Robert, it’s Bat fucking Man.  Retards and 10 year olds can follow this but you’re carrying on like you’re watching 12 Monkeys or some shit.  Jesus, I know you did a lot of blow but so did Belushi and he had no problems with Animal House and The Blues Brothers (both of which are on the same level, intellectually, as Batman).

-Rubix cubes?  Complicated.

-Bush getting re-elected?  Baffling.

-Those cryptic patterns of symbols the Zodiac Killer kept sending to the police?  Mind boggling.

-Batman? You’re a dumbshit.

The only thing I found confusing about The Dark Knight was why everyone deems it necessary to give Heath Ledger sloppy blowjobs just because he’s dead.  Honestly, fuck him.  Just like Sean Taylor, there will be no posthumus handjobs here.  RIP?  Sure.  Oscar worthy? Fuck off.

For those of you who have not seen this dumbass comic book movie but are hellbent on wasting 3 hours of your life on it, first watch a bunch of Lewis Black.  Heath constantly rips off Lewis’ body language the whole film, to the point of outright plagiarism.

Enough with Robert the Retard and Heath the Corpse, college football kicks off today.  Finally we will have something else to see on SportsCenter aside from MLB and Brett Favre sightings.  Games to watch?  Aside from Random ShitSchool vs Other Random ShitSchool, we have Stanford vs Oregon State and NC State vs the South Carolina Cawks.  I dont know about you folks but I’m definitely ditching work early to get obliterated before these games.

Tomorrow: More curse words with sports topics tossed in intermittently and also the BIWMB (been a long time coming).